Skip to main content

A Tale of Two Churches

Yesterday was my first Sunday off work for several weeks, and I was looking forward to going to a church service. We strolled over to a local Lutheran church for its 11am service only to find they were all out doing good works in the community - extremely admirable, but we rather wished they hadn't chosen that particular Sunday. So we settled for a megachurch we'd been to before, which has several "campuses" around the DFW metroplex.

The trappings are certainly impressive: state-of-the-art sound system, huge screens, slick video sequences, funky banners reflecting the theme of the latest sermon series. Which on this particular Sunday turned out to be about politics. OK, not my number one topic for a sermon, but it's obviously topical right now, and the Bible certainly has plenty to say about kings and leaders. Could be an interesting talk on our responsibilities as Christians and how to interact with our government, and I know the preacher is a good communicator.

That was the worst sermon I've ever heard. And I don't say that lightly. He went for every crowd-raising button-pushing topic you could think of: homosexuality, abortion, benefit fraudsters, drunken louts, terrorist immigrants... and moved it all along with a few way-out caricatures of relativism as a test with no right answers or a hospital where you go in with an inflamed appendix and they decide to cut off your nose... and finished up by labelling socialism as unbiblical and the cause of half the country's problems (the other half being caused by relativism, of course). No, I'm not socialist, nor am I relativist, nor yet do I condone people committing benefit fraud or blowing people up. But the whole thing was designed to whip everyone onto their "the world's going to hell in a handbasket" hobbyhorses without taking any responsibility for the current state of the USA or giving any idea what we might do about it. With a couple of Bible verses and a little prayer at the end to give it a Christian veneer.

As for the rest of the service, we were treated to several songs by the beautiful young musicians, which most of the congregation either didn't know or found difficult to sing, or both; a slick video presentation encouraging us all to go straight to the church shop and buy their newly-released worship album; and a list of notices (again, very well presented). No prayers. Have you ever been to a worship service where they just don't talk to God? It's weird.

Through a somewhat convoluted series of events, we found ourselves, later that day, standing outside a cafe in a small town named Justin where a church service was about to start. We hadn't intended to join them, but a man carrying an amp inside insisted so strongly that we were welcome that we felt it impolite to refuse. He introduced himself as Brother Massey and led us through the door, where we were introduced to various other brothers and sisters and ushered to seats in the centre of the front row. Although the music consisted only of electric guitar, keyboard, sax and electric drumkit, the ceiling was low and the congregation enthusiastic, and the effect was rather like being dropped in the middle of a gospel choir! It was fantastic. It was utterly crazy, of course, but it was just great.

There were about 30 people of all ages and widely varying beauty packed into this tiny cafe. The preacher interjected "Praise the Lord" after every other sentence, which rather made us wonder if he did that all week or just on Sundays ("That's $2.57, praise the Lord! Thanks to God, have you seen our special offer today?"). Healing was prayed for fervently, with laying on of hands, speaking in tongues and anointing with oil. A lady of 25 told us how her cancer tests had recently come back clear, just as it was looking like she'd have to have a hysterectomy. The sermon was entitled "Why eat lunch with the devil when you can eat dinner with your daddy?" and was about how the devil can't touch us in God's house, but he's desperate to drag us outside of it and get us to make a mess of our lives. Not an interpretation of the parable of the prodigal son I've heard before, but I could kind of see what he was getting at. It was full-on Pentecostalism with added enthusiasm, which isn't something I've been exposed to much, and I wasn't at all sure what Graham would make of it, with his very limited experience of Christian craziness.

But however mad it looked and sounded, however uncomfortable we felt at suddenly being made guests of honour in the middle of it, however much we wouldn't normally express ourselves like that: there was something real in that church. Something that wasn't in the megachurch, with all its 20 000 people and slick presentation. These people had faith, and were excited about it, and it showed. And if God was anywhere that Sunday, I reckon he was with them.


(Graham, in fact, said he felt surprisingly comfortable there, and seems to have rather taken to hand-waving and "Praise the Lord"ing. Maybe I've married a Pentecostal...)

Comments

Anonymous said…
Great story...I seem to be reading your blog backwards, but i'm enjoying it, thanks Martha!

Popular posts from this blog

Enthusiasm and cynicism

Some while ago I heard a sermon on the story of Zacchaeus. I forget what the point of the sermon was - usually for this Bible passage it's something about Jesus saving everyone, even the unlikely people. But I remember wondering, did Zacchaeus really give all that money away? Image by Alexa from Pixabay You may remember the tale: Zacchaeus is a corrupt government official who is rather short. When Jesus arrives in town, Zacchaeus wants to get a look at him. So he climbs a tree to see over other people's heads. However, Jesus spots him and tells him to get out of the tree and go cook Jesus some dinner. I assume Jesus phrased it a little more nicely than that, because Zacchaeus is delighted, and moreover, promises to change his entire lifestyle. "Half of my possessions I give to the poor," he declares with the enthusiasm of the instant convert, "and anyone I've defrauded, I'll pay back four times over." The surrounding crowd are the cynics: Jesus, th...

The winter walker's guide to spirituality

You may be familiar with Paul's illustration of the Armour of God in his letter to the Ephesians. He lists such items as the breastplate of righteousness and the helmet of salvation, and exhorts his readers to "stand firm" against the enemy's attacks, wearing the whole armour of God. For those original readers in Ephesus, a Roman soldier was probably an everyday sight. They would be familiar with swords and shields, and may well have owned some themselves. However, I don't come across any Roman soldiers very often. It takes me an extra imaginative leap to be able to visualise the armour, and then associate it with technical religious jargon like righteousness and faith. Also, I've never really got on board with this spiritual warfare business. I'm sure it's down to my circumstances or temperament or spiritual immaturity or something - I don't discount the whole concept, but I can't say I've ever had a moment where I felt like I was crossing...

Limestone Way: The Three B's

This walk on the Limestone Way takes me to three villages starting with B: Ballidon, Brassington, and Bradbourne.   Parwich to Brassington The weather forecast says it's fine, but as I walk out of Parwich some light rain starts, which persists for most of the walk. It's not enough to make me properly wet. Parwich sits in a large bowl; the kind of landscape where you can see where you're heading, where you came from, and the next hill you are going to have to climb. The area has been inhabited by humans for thousands of years .  A short climb up a field takes me to Highway Lane, which I follow down again, and then bear left across the fields to Ballidon. I can see the chimney of Ballidon Quarry, and a building which looks like an old chapel. I assume it must now be a private house, but when I get there, I discover that this is All Saints church, now in the care of the Friends of Friendless Churches. What a nice surprise! I'm intrigued by the Creed and Ten Com...