Skip to main content

Proclaiming

"Yea and verily, I proclaim unto thee...

Oh, hang on, what century is it on Earth these days?  The 21st?

Dang it, I forgot the iPhone.  Can you understand me if I don't use Twitter?

OK, let's try this again.  Ummm...

Hey, right, you're something special, y'know?  And the Big Man is, like, right here with you?

Nononono, don't cry!  What did I say wrong?  I haven't even got to the difficult bit yet.  Seriously.  Here, have a tissue and pull yourself together.

OK, now God's really happy with you, got it?  Hold that thought.  And behold... no, sorry, sorry...

And, like, you're gonna have a baby, right?  Yeah, hang onto that tissue, I've got another one if you need it.

Yup, a baby.  Little boy.  He's gonna be awesome, trust me on that.  He will be great, and will be called the Son of the Most High... oh, don't worry, I'll send you a Facebook message with all that later.

No, I know you haven't been sleeping around.  Did I say you had?  This is, like, a proper God thing, right?  Holy Spirit and all that.  Slightly outside the scope of those Personal Social Sexual Hygiene Lifeskills Education lessons or whatever they call them these days.  Citizenship, is it?  Well, that's shorter, I suppose.

Anyhow, my point is, this is more Personal Supernatural Holiness Education, right?  This kid is, like, actually the Son of God.  No messing.

And that cousin of your mum's?  The one who always thought she couldn't have kids?  Yeah, she's preggers, too.  Maybe you two could chat.

There's a good girl.  I knew you'd come around to the idea.  One more tissue?  All right, I've gotta fly, then.  Text me if you need to, 'K?  Byeeee!"

 In the sixth month the angel Gabriel was sent from God to a city of Galilee named Nazareth, to a virgin betrothed to a man whose name was Joseph, of the house of David. And the virgin's name was Mary.  And he came to her and said, “Greetings, O favoured one, the Lord is with you!”
Luke 1:26-28
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Trent Valley: Twyford, both ways

To complete my loop along the Dove Valley  from the mouth at Newton Solney up to Dovedale at Thorpe, across to Matlock on the Limestone Way , and back south along the Derwent Valley , I needed to walk one last section along the River Trent from Derwent Mouth to Repton. Originally I planned to do it in that direction. But for various reasons I ended up doing it the other way. The walk from Repton to Ingleby was completed weeks ago, at the beginning of June, and, for the sake of completeness, I also, later, walked from Findern to Twyford, on the other bank of the river. If I had done the walk sixty years or more ago, I could have crossed the river by ford or ferry at Twyford, and that would have been my most direct route home. the Trent at Twyford Walk 1: Repton to Ingleby Starting from the centre of Repton, I made my way out of the village and crossed the fields to Milton. Wystan Arboretum Milton The Trent Rivers Trust has been busy establishing the Trent Valley Way . This sect...
Post a Comment
Read more

Trent Valley: the march of the pylons

In the 1980s, the River Trent supplied the cooling water for fifteen coal-fired power stations, each one gobbling up coal from the local mines and quenching its heat with gallons of river water. The area was known as Megawatt Valley . As the 20th century gave way to the 21st, the mines closed, the coal trains stopped running, and the iconic cooling towers, one by one, fell to the ground. The high-voltage electricity lines which connected the stations to the grid are still there, however, and they dominated the walk I did today. The stately silhouettes of pylons stalked across the landscape, carrying fizzing power lines which sliced up the sky. At one point, I was within view of two of the remaining sets of cooling towers. Diving further back into history, I parked by Swarkestone Lock on the Trent & Mersey Canal, walked past St James' Church, and arrived at Swarkestone Bridge, a 14th-century causeway which still, remarkably, carries traffic today. It was famously the southernmos...
Post a Comment
Read more

Derwent Valley: Exploring the Astons

It was the hottest day of the year so far, with a forecast high of 32°C, and I was setting out to walk around three places with very similar names: Elvaston, Alvaston, and Ambaston. I was mostly hoping they would be shady! I was expecting to park at Elvaston Castle Country Park, where there is pay and display parking, but I spotted a large layby in Elvaston village, which was not only free, but also shaded by a large hedge. This meant that I didn't walk through much of the country park. Instead I skirted the edges, passing the village hall, with its decorative windows, and approaching Elvaston Castle itself along an avenue of yew trees. Elvaston village hall yew avenue Elvaston Castle was built for the Earls of Harrington and sold to Derbyshire County Council in 1969. Unfortunately the council is struggling to find enough money to keep the building in a state of repair. The castle isn't open to the public, but the gardens are well worth a walk around. The estate church, St Bart...
Post a Comment
Read more